Those were the good old machines.

I want my old washer back, except that it was leaking ugly thick grease.

But my new washer is designed to keep me out of it. Keep me from lifting the lid and repositioning the load when it gets off balance and won't spin right.

It's out there now making a lot of noise as the tub bangs against the drum. (Are those the correct terms?) And it won't complete the spin cycle.

Please don't tell me things to try. I've tried them.