It's tempting, I know, to take a grape from one of those open bags in the produce department. It would be nice to know if the ones you plan to buy are good. So you take one and try it out. It doesn't exactly seem to be stealing, although it is. Exactly.
I saw a woman do it today.
I have done it myself.
But once I choked on a grape I had filched. I mean, I really had a choking fit. And ever after I see in my mind a certain newspaper headline. Probably front page, given my religion. Know what I mean? Here it is:
LOCAL MORMON WOMAN CHOKES TO DEATH IN SUPERMARKET ON STOLEN GRAPE.
That thought keeps me honest. Mostly.
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