Philosophy, Mine, For now

My friend, school nurse just now retired, called today. Her last daughter to marry did marry two weeks ago. I went to the wedding in Utah, although they live in Middleton, Idaho.

While there I asked the groom why they chose to marry in Bountiful, Utah. "We just wanted to." Good enough reason. I was glad they didn't "just want to" get married in, say, the Philippines.

Beautiful bride, handsome groom. Truly. And so on. We spoke of their bright future.

Then we spoke of her last unmarried child, the boy who just last month broke off his engagement to "an absolutely perfect girl." I have no reason to doubt that the girl was perfect. My retired nurse friend knows stuff--and people--and she told me many things this girl had done that helped her son, made him a better person. And so on.

Me: Well, why did he break up with her?

Retired Nurse: Because he's an idiot. And he says she doesn't make his heart pound.

Me: Oh. Too bad.

RN: But I think it has to do with the fact that she wouldn't let him paw her and, you know, climb all over her.

Me: Oh, yeah.

RN: I told him a girl who has dated lots of guys gets to feeling like a piece of meat.

Me: Well, maybe he'll find someone who makes his heart pound, and maybe she'll find some really good guy.

RN: She has gone with some good guys, but when it comes time for marriage, they don't want to marry her.

Me: Why? Is she ugly?

RN: No. She's adorable.

So then I gave RN part 2 of my philosophy about beauty and ugliness. I know it's out of order; part 1 should come before part 2. But part 2 seemed to fit here.

Me: I believe there are very few ugly people in this world.

RN: Maybe, but there is a really ugly man who would come to the school, bring his kids to drop off, and he was so ugly that my gag reflex kicked in when I saw him. I couldn't help it.

Me: Wow.

RN: And his voice and his smell. I didn't want to be in the same room with him. His wife is nice looking, volunteers often. I could not understand it. Thinking about being married to him made me gag all over again. He was so ugly. In every way.

I was getting the picture. The man is ugly.
So then I gave her part 1 of my philosophy.

Me: An ugly man can do all right in this world, but no one loves an ugly woman.

RN: Ain't it the truth. Oh yes, that is so true.

Me: But I may have to make adjustments to this philosophy because I had not entertained the thought that someone might gag at the sight of an ugly man. I'm not sure that we can say an ugly man is "doing all right" if the sight of him elicits gagging.

RN: (Laughter)

Of course, we spoke of many other things, but this is the part that stays in my mind because it made me wonder if I will have to change my philosophy. I just don't know.